The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Homeschooling

Homeschooling is beautiful, fun, challenging and a whole lot of hard, and if anyone tells you it isn’t they are flat out lying. 

Yesterday, my daughter started her first day of seventh grade, (her 8th year of homeschooling) and it was by far the worst day ever. Ha! Ok, partially this is my fault, I’ll admit it. I did nothing special, there were no pictures or pancakes or happy back to school signs, a.k.a there was no celebrating and no fluff. I personally need the fun and celebration and I’m sure my girl does too, but sadly, there just wasn’t time and I honestly didn’t have it in me. I had just returned from two weekends of work retreats and then a week at family camp alone with our four kids. We had to start her schooling on a Friday in order to prepare for her first day of class with our Classical Conversations group, the following week. We got out all her supplies and attempted to get her organized for her first community day. We went through her curriculum and started with what I thought would be the easiest subject, Latin. She whined a lot, she told me it was too hard (copying Latin), she told me she’s not good at Latin over and over. I basically had two choices: ignore her bad attitude (which is super hard because one of my strengths is Positivity so her complaining literally sucks the joy from me) or encourage her. I chose the latter, for a bit. I told her she could do it, she’s smart, capable, it’s just copy work which she’s been doing for years & years and that eventually it would be easy with practice. She fussed some more, and eventually, I broke. I gave her the, “Stop complaining and whining at me, because you wouldn’t do this in public school,” speech. Did it work?...you’re probably wondering? Well, it crushed her spirit and she became compliant, if that’s what you consider success. I however, do not. 

So here’s what I’ve learned, Mamas, homeschooling and raising kiddos is so much more than getting the job done, and really more about the relationships and who I’m training them to be. Don’t get me wrong, as a former elementary school teacher I KNOW my kids have to do the work, whether they like it or not, but I have the choice to determine our “classroom climate” and be the kind of teacher that will have patience, and teach my kiddos the value of hard work and positive self talk, or become exhausted and frustrated and yell at them. Here’s the thing, I never yelled at my classrooms, and I taught for 12 years. Mainly because I didn’t want kids to feel unsafe in my classroom, but loved... and if I’m being really, really honest, I was afraid they’d tell their parents or my principal. So, why in the world do I think it’s ok to get frustrated and yell at the gifts that God has given me, my own kids? Maybe because our culture tells us it’s ok...it’s ok to get overwhelmed and lose your stuff on your kids, everyone does occasionally.  I mean I am with them all day, everyday, right? Or..It’s ok to yell if it’s to get your point across or if they’re not listening. But really, I know for me, it’s just a heart condition. God’s word says, “Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.” Matthew 15:18

I’ve learned when I lose my stuff on my kids, it’s because my heart is not focused on God, I’m not reading my Bible, praying and asking God to use me in this role of teacher and Mama. So, I’m starting fresh this next week with a new schedule of waking up with coffee, Bible study and prayer before I attempt to homeschool my kiddos. 

I’m thankful that next week we get to start again and that we can all get a do-over.  Here’s to a new week, friends! 

I’d love to hear how your year is going and how I can be praying for you!